Mister Quickly’s Customer Reviews

Mister Quickly schrijft reviews op amazon.com. Woensdag schreef hij er twee, voor Happy for No Reason: 7 Steps to Being Happy from the Inside Out en voor de Samsung HLT5087SAX 50″ Slim LED Engine 1080p DLP HDTV. Daarvoor was het geleden van 10 augustus 2007, de review van Mortal Kombat: A Novel:

Based upon the popular film Mortal Kombat, ‘Mortal Kombat: A Novel’ is beginning to be recognised as one of the classic Bildungsromans, standing rightfully alongside “To Kill the Mockingbird”, Thomas Mann’s “The Magic Mountain”, or even the Rob Reiner documentary “Stand By Me.” The story’s protagonist is Sub Zero, a sort of Wil Wheaton character we grow along with, his sparkling innocence complicated by his dark emotional past.

Generally the book is very faithful to the film, and what it lacks in the movies luscious visual textures it makes up for with Martin Delrio’s robust lyricism. In one episode of the book, Sub Zero is looking at Scorpion, whose leg he has just frozen “in a legwarmer of diamond butterflies”, while Scorpion “evacuates from the dungeon of his guts a powerful bellow.” Or another scene, Johnny Cage uppercuts Reptile and the action momentarily suspends in this delicate lull; a wind “enchanted with a fine herbed pungency from whisking through a sage patch” passes between Johnny Cage and Reptile, who is “barfing green poisonous syrup.”

I also found touching the comradery that develops between Lui Kang and Sub Zero. Whenever they made a “pinky swear” to keep a promise, my eyes would mist at the purity of their bond. I wish that we could all have such friends and such memories.

My only criticism is how artlessly Delrio handles the countless love scenes between Raiden and Sonja Blade, that they came off as very blunt and tasteless and even misogynous. “Raiden took the mewling Sonja, who he had little respect for” writes Delrio “and mounted her while grunting.” Again 40 pages later, “Raiden was disgusted with the cheap perfume Sonja wore as he had sex with her.” I mean, these are really crass compared with some of the subtler delicacies of Delrio’s prose.

5 stars in any case. This book is timeless… immortal kombat.

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